Saturday, October 28, 2006

Does it break your heart .......?

October 28th 2006
Budaiya

DOES IT BREAK YOUR HEART .......?

Does it break your heart when you created something for yourself and in the end someone else takes your place ?

Does this happen to anyone...or is it me...only me that is having a tough luck in this world ?

Many many moons back, we decided to share our lives, in sickness and in health and all those sweet nothings.We went looking for a new house and found one that was suitable to his needs. He needed a studio to house all his sounds equipments, so a house with a basement was priority. A simple brick house with a big compound and an apple tree in the back yard was what we decided upon. He spruced up the house, gave it a new coat of paint and did a bit of renovation, adding a bathroom and a bigger closet.
As what had been known, we can only plan but God executes it.
Things happened and I found out about the existence of a third party and called it quits. It was hard and painful.
Painful to see what should be rightfully yours, suddenly changed hands.
Suddenly someone else moved in and take over what you have worked before.
And I was left with nothing but a feeling of lost and rejection.
Up till today, at the back of my mind I am still thinking that the place belongs to me, and I should have been the one having a flower garden in the summer months. It is a rerun of a battered movie of me and my new family.
It should me beside him sitting on the swing on the back deck enjoying quiet moments in the autumn of our lives.

Back to the present.......
And now I am watching someone else taking over my place again. She and her followers are of course laughing with glee. It breaks my heart yet once again to see someone else sitting at my place.
How I wish I have the ability to be like a chameleon and be able to put on a fake smile and carry on without any feelings of remorse.

They say that all these trials and tribulations will make aperson stronger. God will not present you with anything unless he knew that you can handle it. And when you are down and out, you will remember God and it will make you closer to Him.

ps:
There is always a rainbow after a rain.
Lets wait for that rainbow.......shall we ?

13 comments:

Mama Bliss said...

hi happen to chance upon your blog, hope you won't find me intruding..

Just wish to give you a word of encouragement...

Indeed, there's rainbow after the rain... just like there's sunshine after the night is over... it's not easy dealing with heart breaks... but chin up girl! There's still hope for a better tomorrow!

Shionge said...

I am sorry to hear about this but on a positive note, things happened for a reason and yes...perhaps a rainbow is gonna appear very soon.

Remember, whatever that don't break you can only make you stronger and I certainly think so.

Be strong my dear friend.

ammoontie said...

Hi mama bliss...thanks for your words of encouragement. You are right..there is always sunshine...

ammoontie said...

Hi shionge,
Things happened for a reason...has always been proven true... only we need to analyse it. Well...I hope it will make me a stronger person.
Now....where is that rainbow...

zid said...

the rainbow is in you dear ammoon. it's always there. nobody can take that from you

"And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you"

ammoontie said...

ahaa..Zid,
such nice things that you said...yallah..we have to give some credits to ourselves right ?
Will do... the next time if I look at the place...I'll tell myself...
its not a total loss...!! I'll get better ones...

zid said...

that's the spirit! u go girl

ingat jer dlm hati, lebih dr tu, aku boley dapat.. ahaks

ammoontie said...

Zid....
Dalam hati...gerrrrraammmmm.....yang amat...

SomeGuyFromPlanet said...

Hi, I'm really sad reading this post of yours. And I hope you're okay. But I guess you have to be carefull not to easily trust people. Perhaps you can find something to learn from it ?

But yes I believe you deserve all the rainbows after all these. :)

ammoontie said...

hi someguyfromplanet, Yes I was sad for 'some' while, but I am okay now, time heals a lot of things, but the scar remains.

IRC President said...

Some people deserve more in this world, others deserve much less than they already have.

The problem is those others don't see or think it from the same perspective. This makes the pain. So powerful how time endures the pain as a feeling, with some inside scar hidden by our internal stability.

ammoontie said...

hi IRC,
Sometimes it is how you look at happiness and pain. That will determines one's strength. Some people will not be affected much by it all. Sometimes pain came in double or triple...but we will get over it...for sure..!!

Shionge said...

Hiya Ammoontie...Hope you are well and fine ...take care.